When I get into a book or movie series, well, I tend to consume it. Right now it’s midnight, and although I am about to pause my second film of the evening, First Contact, and go to bed, I’m realising that I’m going to be watching a few more movies in the next few days…
St Valentine’s day has oft annoyed me. For starters, it’s Saint Valentine’s day, but noone seems to remember this. That’s just a pet peeve, I know, but it gets to me every year, for some reason. We don’t forget a month later that St Patrick was a saint. Admittedly, little is known about the original Valentinus, except that several people with the name were martyred, and his feast day was fixed as Feb 14th on the Anglican, Lutheran, and used to be in the Catholic calendars, with the Eastern Orthodox Church celebrating the feast later in the year. Interestingly, the Catholic Church removed it from the calendar because little was known about him, and presumably the lack of spiritual meaning associated with the feast’s modern celebration. The day was first associated with romantic love by Chaucer in the middle ages, and the modern celebration with cards etc dates only back to the 18th and 19th centuries, where one can see the seeds of the first ridiculously commercialised holiday in America. Even with the purported purpose, I think we often miss the point. Men feel under obligation and pressure (so the expression of love is less natural and more forced), women can feel entitled or wind up disappointed from possibly unrealistic expectations, for some the day is just a depressing reminder, and others are just trying to get laid.
But don’t mark me as too much of a cynic, not just yet. (more…)
Riiiiight…if I use or show humour (and if I look amused, wow) when we’re having an argument…well we’re having a whole lot more argument!
Other than that, I more or less agree. I mean, we have a child, and I think we’re closer and happier since he’s been along, albeit tired and busier. I don’t have a degree (despite several years of university…long story of an eternal student, in school or not), and I don’t work because I’m caring for our son. But I’ll agree with (I think) everything else. More sex = happier and more peaceful. I’d add that fighting is important (if we don’t fight we don’t sort out the issue we’re not fighting about, and it doesn’t get resolved) – and fighting ‘well’ is more important. I think we’re still happier, after more than two years, than before we were wed, but a kid definitely throws a strain. I think that we’re closer and happier since he’s been here, in spite of the added exhaustion, stress and reduced freedom (it’s a paradox, I know). Actually, I think it’s been all the tough experiences we’ve been through together, distance, waiting on visas, very different style families, churches and cultures…we’ve had to do the talking during the distance and working through the differences, that we’re the closer and stronger for it. And our faith, mainly God, and His grace. A lot of grace. And then some more.
How do you feel your experience of marriage compares to the graphic?